evilbeej: (BJ: I wash my hands of it.)

Coreyvsasia.tumblr.com :3

Posted via LiveJournal app for iPhone.

evilbeej: (Bart: Bondage?!)
Okay. Two years ago -- OLD MEME -- the Ellis ran a contest/running gag called 'Hack the Filthy Monkey'. The source image was the title graphic for the late, lamented anarchistic braindump-blog he was running at the time, diepunyhumans.

I have looked up down and sideways on the intarwubs for this source image.

IT'S NOT LEFT ANYWHERE.

In case anyone forgets which image I mean, the clearest and biggest derivative hack I've been able to find can be seen here on Flickr.

I -- for reasons that will become clear soon -- *really need that source image*. Preferably 300px wide or larger.

Please! Please? Anyone?
evilbeej: (Cos: No Time For Subtlety)
Oh. My. Grife. Lyle? Look at her hair.
It is so blonde. *scoff* She looks like,
one of those Brainiac 5 girls.
But, y'know, who understands Brainiac 5? *scoff*
He only talks to her, because,
she looks like a total prostitute, 'kay?
I mean, her hair, is just so blonde. *scoff*
I can't believe it's just so yellow, it's like,
what the sprock, I mean - gross. Look!
She's just so ... blonde!

I like blonde chix and I can not lie
You other brothers can't deny
That when a girl walks in with a great big rack
Balanced blonde hair down her back
You get sprung, gotcha wood like steel
'Cause you notice those tits is real
Wonder Twins in the shirt she's wearing
I'm hooked and I can't stop staring
Oh baby, I wanna get wit'cha
And take your picture
So your lack of brains don't bore me
On my wall, racks and hair, make me so horny

Ooh, Head-o-blonde-hair,
You say you wanna get in my lab?
Well, use me, use me
'Cause you ain't no brown-haired groupie
I've seen them workin'
Hell with them urchins
She's strong, strong,
Got it goin' wearin' just a thong
I'm tired of holovids
Sayin' diversity in my crib
I'm the only one you should ever ask
What kinda blonde I want with that
So, Legion! (Yeah!) Legion! (Yeah!)
Has your chick set up us the blonde? (Hell yeah!)
Tell 'er to hit it! (Hit it!) Hit it! (Hit it!)
Sprockin', I'd hit that!
Baby got BLONDE!
Baby got BLONDE!

I like 'em stacked, and big
Not wearin' goddamn wigs
I just can't help myself, I'm actin' like a Terran
Now here's my error
You're like my mother
And ugh, double-up, ugh, ugh
I ain't talkin' bout new toys
'Cause silicone parts go in androids
I want 'em platinum and juicy
So find that bright-haired double
Dox-a-Lot's in trouble
Beggin' for a look in that Hubble
So I'm lookin' at kinky holos
Watchin' these brunettes fightin' like Jo
They all jones green man-ho
But they can all mack on Lobo
A word to the blonde built sistas, I wanna get with ya
I won't cuss or hit ya
But I gotta be straight when I say I wanna *sprock*
Til the break of dawn
Baby got it goin' on
A lot of simps won't like this song
'Cause them punks like to hit it and quit it
And I'd rather stay and play
'Cause I'm never sprockin' wrong
And I'm down to get the friction on
So, ladies! {Yeah!} Ladies! {Yeah}
If you wanna make lotsa green babies {Yeah!}
Then bleach your hair! Grow it out!
Even brunette-daters gotta shout:
Baby got BLONDE!

Baby got BLONDE!
Yeah, baby ... when it comes to females, style ain't got nothin'
to do with my selection. Triple-breasted whore of Eroticon 6? Heh, only if she's blonde.


...ah god...one more verse to go...
evilbeej: (Cos: Heeeeeyyy...)
"Shiki the Squealer"

Folks, now here's the story 'bout Shiki the Squealer,
She had no clue she was a heart-stealer,
She was the roughest, toughest Kwai,
But Shiki had a set o' come-hither eyes.

Hi-de-hi-de-hi-di-hi!
Ho-de-ho-de-ho-de-ho!
He-de-he-de-he-de-he!
Ho-de-ho-de-ho!

Now, she learned the lingo from this guy, Wildfire,
And he taught her words you don't learn in a choir.
He took her over for a roll in the clover,
Got outta his bodysuit and told her to bend over.

Now, what you don't know's the thing about Drakey,
His wild-fire body means he got an antimatter snakey.
He wanted to get him some sweet Lonestar thang
But the second they touched, they was out with a bang!

Hi-de-hi-de-hi-di-hi!
Ho-de-ho-de-ho-de-ho!
He-de-he-de-he-de-he!
Ho-de-ho-de-ho!

Poor Shiki, poor Shiki, poor Shiki.

With apologies to Irving Mills, Clarence Glaskill, and Cab Calloway.

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